Awkward is . . .
a silent elevator ride with a person you usually try to avoid.
falling asleep on the couch...daily.
slapping someone on the back that you thought you knew, but then finding out it wasn't them.
waving to someone you thought you knew, but then finding out it wasnt' them.
waving to someone you DO know, but they don't recognize you.
being called unAmerican and ungirl. Seriously, what does that mean?
making random laughing noises...when nothing is funny.
having to "ford the river" in order to get to class on a rainy day.
having your rain boots fill up with water.
not being able to think of any more awkward circumstances.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Thursday, November 13, 2008
"I think I sat on your bike"
Due to the overwhelming popularity of the last post, I have been inundated with calls, emails and texts from people begging me to post their awkward stories. Okay, so it was just one, and it was in person, and she wasn't begging me, but you get the idea.
My dear friend Izzy had perhaps one of the most obscure awkward moments the other day. Izzy is a bike rider. Meaning she rides her bike to and from class. (she's one of those kids that tries to run over any pedestrian within 50 feet of the bike lane, so watch out!) She was at the bike rack, either parking her bike, or getting it (I don't really remember) and hears some guy talking to her. She looks over and there's this guy, we'll call him crazy lawn hippie (because that's what he was).
Crazy lawn hippie: I think I sat on your bike.
Izzy: ...okay...
CLH: I saw it and thought your seat looked really comfy. My mom wants a bike and so I thought I'd see if that was comfy enough for her.
Izzy: ...yeah. It's pretty comfy. I like it. I think your mom would like it, too.
As I was being told the story, it was difficult for me to control the laughter that came. I'm sure all of you are rolling on the floor right now, along with me. It's just so bizarre!
My dear friend Izzy had perhaps one of the most obscure awkward moments the other day. Izzy is a bike rider. Meaning she rides her bike to and from class. (she's one of those kids that tries to run over any pedestrian within 50 feet of the bike lane, so watch out!) She was at the bike rack, either parking her bike, or getting it (I don't really remember) and hears some guy talking to her. She looks over and there's this guy, we'll call him crazy lawn hippie (because that's what he was).
Crazy lawn hippie: I think I sat on your bike.
Izzy: ...okay...
CLH: I saw it and thought your seat looked really comfy. My mom wants a bike and so I thought I'd see if that was comfy enough for her.
Izzy: ...yeah. It's pretty comfy. I like it. I think your mom would like it, too.
As I was being told the story, it was difficult for me to control the laughter that came. I'm sure all of you are rolling on the floor right now, along with me. It's just so bizarre!
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Joanie's Story
So, I have this friend. Let's call her Joanie. She is an avid reader of Life Is Awkward, and felt compelled to share one of her own personal stories with me. I felt the need to retell it here, for all of you to embrace.
DISCLAIMER: Some of the facts may be faulty due to the memory of the author, but the essence is the same.
Joanie worked at a camp this summer. About six weeks into the summer, the staff was taking a relaxing break from the stresses of camp and went to a Barnes and Noble in a nearby city. Now, Joanie knew there was a staff guy (let's call him Frank) that had a crush on her. Sadly, she didn't feel the same. Now, here comes the good part. Joanie is with a friend looking at some books, chatting it up, when all of a sudden who comes by but Frank. Says Frank "Hey, can we talk?" Says Joanie "Sure." Not thinking it would be anything of importance, she walked right into the trap.
Frank: I like you.
Joanie: Uh.
Frank: (silence)
Joanie: We're in a BARNES AND NOBLE!!!
Frank: (silence)
Joanie: I'm sorry, I don't like you like that. I value your friendship, but I don't want to pursue anything else.
Frank: Okay.
So, perhaps this isn't as bad as you'd think, but it gets a little bit better. Joanie's fight or flight response kicks in and she chooses flight. She goes to find her other friends who happen to be in the "Christian dating" section. Ironic? One of her friends, let's call him Bob, says something about a DTR (now for some of you who may not be versed in the dating jargon of today, that means "defining the relationship". It's usually that awkward conversation that starts with, "so..." "so..." . You get the picture) Joanie mutters under her breath to her other friend, let's call her Ellie, "I just had one of those." Bob is listening, and is quite curious and follows Joanie and Ellie to a different section as Joanie is trying to tell the story to Ellie. Now, not only has Joanie experienced the awkwardness of the century, she has to share it with Bob, a boy. Poor Joanie.
And that is Joanie's story. If any of you have severely awkward stories that you feel should be shared with the rest of us, feel free to send them to me. I'd love to hear them!
DISCLAIMER: Some of the facts may be faulty due to the memory of the author, but the essence is the same.
Joanie worked at a camp this summer. About six weeks into the summer, the staff was taking a relaxing break from the stresses of camp and went to a Barnes and Noble in a nearby city. Now, Joanie knew there was a staff guy (let's call him Frank) that had a crush on her. Sadly, she didn't feel the same. Now, here comes the good part. Joanie is with a friend looking at some books, chatting it up, when all of a sudden who comes by but Frank. Says Frank "Hey, can we talk?" Says Joanie "Sure." Not thinking it would be anything of importance, she walked right into the trap.
Frank: I like you.
Joanie: Uh.
Frank: (silence)
Joanie: We're in a BARNES AND NOBLE!!!
Frank: (silence)
Joanie: I'm sorry, I don't like you like that. I value your friendship, but I don't want to pursue anything else.
Frank: Okay.
So, perhaps this isn't as bad as you'd think, but it gets a little bit better. Joanie's fight or flight response kicks in and she chooses flight. She goes to find her other friends who happen to be in the "Christian dating" section. Ironic? One of her friends, let's call him Bob, says something about a DTR (now for some of you who may not be versed in the dating jargon of today, that means "defining the relationship". It's usually that awkward conversation that starts with, "so..." "so..." . You get the picture) Joanie mutters under her breath to her other friend, let's call her Ellie, "I just had one of those." Bob is listening, and is quite curious and follows Joanie and Ellie to a different section as Joanie is trying to tell the story to Ellie. Now, not only has Joanie experienced the awkwardness of the century, she has to share it with Bob, a boy. Poor Joanie.
And that is Joanie's story. If any of you have severely awkward stories that you feel should be shared with the rest of us, feel free to send them to me. I'd love to hear them!
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Awkward Reminiscence
Since awkward things don't tend to happen when I'm sitting in my room all day long, there is not much to report. However, since there have been many requests for more stories, I will share a few of my more awkward incidences from the past.
I feel like I need to explain a bit before I can jump right into this story. My freshman year of college my roommate and I lived on the boy's side of the building. I guess there were too many girls and not enough boys, so we got the boot. It really wasn't that big of a deal, but it sure provided for some interesting experiences.
And this is where the story of our friendship with our neighbors really begins. My very first night in the dorm was before most people moved in. My parents had come to help me move everything in, and had left me. All alone. Sad. But anyway, I was so terrified to go out of my room that I pretty much sat there watching tv the whole afternoon. When I finally got up the courage to leave to walk down the hall and around the corner to bathroom, I noticed that the names that were on my door when I moved in were no longer there. That's right, some boy had stolen my nametag! When I came back to my room, I noticed that, sure enough, they were there on the door right across from mine. Well, I was too scared to do anything about it, so I just left it, and went into my room a little irritated. I woke up the next morning to find that the names had been returned to their rightful spots. It turns out that the guys had come to move in that morning and were equally surprised to find girls names on their door.
I feel like I need to explain a bit before I can jump right into this story. My freshman year of college my roommate and I lived on the boy's side of the building. I guess there were too many girls and not enough boys, so we got the boot. It really wasn't that big of a deal, but it sure provided for some interesting experiences.
And this is where the story of our friendship with our neighbors really begins. My very first night in the dorm was before most people moved in. My parents had come to help me move everything in, and had left me. All alone. Sad. But anyway, I was so terrified to go out of my room that I pretty much sat there watching tv the whole afternoon. When I finally got up the courage to leave to walk down the hall and around the corner to bathroom, I noticed that the names that were on my door when I moved in were no longer there. That's right, some boy had stolen my nametag! When I came back to my room, I noticed that, sure enough, they were there on the door right across from mine. Well, I was too scared to do anything about it, so I just left it, and went into my room a little irritated. I woke up the next morning to find that the names had been returned to their rightful spots. It turns out that the guys had come to move in that morning and were equally surprised to find girls names on their door.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Elevator awkwardness
Okay, now everyone grab a glass of milk and let's have a toast to the first post and get ready to embrace the awkwardness that is everyday life! :D
So, you all know how awkward elevators can be. I've definitely had my share of awkward elevator moments, but I think tonight's experience just might top them all.
As you should all know, today was election day. As I just turned 21 a few weeks ago, this was my first presidential election and therefore I was really excited! Who wouldn't be, right? I just love the little stickers they give you to show to the whole world that you performed your civic duty. Anyway, I'm on my way to Bible study with my friend, and we wait for the elevator. And wait. And wait. I finally get upstairs and notice that "Oh my gosh! Where's my sticker?!" I had to find it! So, we trek back, thinking it must have fallen off in the elevator. So, we push the button and wait. And wait. And wait. Finally an elevator comes, but not the one we rode up in. So a few people get on and kind of stare at us. Door closes. We wait. And wait. And wait. Another elevator comes...still not ours. A girl gets on the elevator and while it is closing, seriously follows us with her whole head. You know what I mean. It's what you see in movies. She's standing there, we're standing on the outside, and she actually leans to stare as the door is closing. So, a few minutes later, our elevator finally arrives and we get on and go down. No sticker to be seen anywhere. But, you know what we did find? The girl on the other elevator. Still staring.
So I'm still without a sticker, but I have a new story. I guess it works out.
So, you all know how awkward elevators can be. I've definitely had my share of awkward elevator moments, but I think tonight's experience just might top them all.
As you should all know, today was election day. As I just turned 21 a few weeks ago, this was my first presidential election and therefore I was really excited! Who wouldn't be, right? I just love the little stickers they give you to show to the whole world that you performed your civic duty. Anyway, I'm on my way to Bible study with my friend, and we wait for the elevator. And wait. And wait. I finally get upstairs and notice that "Oh my gosh! Where's my sticker?!" I had to find it! So, we trek back, thinking it must have fallen off in the elevator. So, we push the button and wait. And wait. And wait. Finally an elevator comes, but not the one we rode up in. So a few people get on and kind of stare at us. Door closes. We wait. And wait. And wait. Another elevator comes...still not ours. A girl gets on the elevator and while it is closing, seriously follows us with her whole head. You know what I mean. It's what you see in movies. She's standing there, we're standing on the outside, and she actually leans to stare as the door is closing. So, a few minutes later, our elevator finally arrives and we get on and go down. No sticker to be seen anywhere. But, you know what we did find? The girl on the other elevator. Still staring.
So I'm still without a sticker, but I have a new story. I guess it works out.
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